The Final Roar

My Mother passed away on January 31, 2019. She celebrated her ninetieth birthday just four weeks and one day earlier on January 2nd.

Inexplicably my Mother who never drank, never smoked was stricken with oral cancer in 2014.

She endured four hours of surgery to remove this cancer in December 2014.

My father had dementia/Alzheimer’s, and she elected to undergo months of painful radiation so she could continue to care for my Dad. My Dad passed away 18 months later.

When her cancer returned late last year, she chose to not undergo an invasive surgical procedure, another round of radiation or possibly chemotherapy.

During the last weeks of her life, I asked her if she would have chosen something else for herself if my Dad had already passed. And she told me she wouldn’t have gone thru that, but she was glad that she did that as it allowed her to see her grandson Adam get married last May to a wonderful young woman, Lindsey who my Mother loved dearly.

My Mother was admitted into the inpatient facility at Denver Hospice a couple of weeks ago, and we all began preparing in different ways for this final run towards the roar of my Mother’s life.

We spent an afternoon filled with love, laughter, and tears on a Saturday afternoon as my Mother read a favorite bible verse of her Mothers preserved in her Mother’s handwriting from 1946.

She shared a story of how her step-mother(Grandma Moodge Moodge, as my sister and I, called her) kept her Daddy going thru his battle with pancreatic cancer. My Mother said he died with his “boots on.” and our solemn vow was to allow her when that time came to say that she died with her boots on as her father did.

My Mother was able to rally one final time when Adam came over to visit with her on Wednesday. She so loved her grandchildren, Laura and Adam. They had a special bond of love that transcends this world. She lit up whenever Laura and Adam were around or when could brag about them to her friends. A Grandmother’s privilege.

So my Mother ran to the final roar of her life in the same way she lived her life, putting everyone’s needs in front of hers, armed only with kindness.

And for us, we now have to follow her example of how to live our lives, with humility, compassion, kindness, and curiosity. To always choose to run towards the roar of our lives instead of away from it.

And above all to choose love and kindness. Nothing else matters.

Thanks, Mother, for choosing me to be your son.

In love and gratitude,

Ross

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